Trials

God loved me enough to put me through a trial recently.  I couldnt understand what was taking place - all I knew in a couple of days things went out of hand and I lost people I knew for a long long time.
The understanding of things was not there but still in the realization of why I think they happened hurt even more.  They pass judgement for things that they themselves have caused by their own hands.  I did see the signs I just totally ignored them. 

I saw different sides to people that I never knew existed.  One day someone is telling me I am an amazing woman and the very next day it was a different story being told. Who knows what the hidden agendas could have been.  I was forced to let things go and move on and not fighting for what I know to be the truth. 

Friends claim they love you but when the going gets tough they allow you to walk in darkness as they sit back and smile causing conflicts everywhere they turn.  What was even more enlightening to me is that these emotions was there all along, it was just disguised in a way I never suspected.

This has happened to every single one of us at some point or the other but yet still when it happens to people we know we take sides without even asking "What happened".  A true leader always put the welfare of their followers above their own.  They have a sense of stern kindness when they need to be and their humbleness is evidence of the wisdom they have within.

When I sit and listen to my conscience, my inner guidance - you know the thing that never steers you wrong ?  U find all the answers to every single question and you realise that God was there all along.  He was just guiding you to a better place but it took something ugly to get you there.  This year is a year of cleansing,  and so it will be.  Things will happen that we dont understand but it will be for our higher good. 

You always try to remember the good in others -- people were not always this way - change is constant.  Remember the times you laughed with the person, when you would have lunch and talk for hours.  Keep those memories alive and let go of the ones that hurt -- it has already served its purpose. 

When I look back now I smile,  I use to think if I lost people I will be so alone.  I am overwhelmed by how much more God have put into my life now.  People that sit with me and laugh uncontrollably, People that everyday when we talk its filled with inspiration and helping others.  People that come online just to say hello and share with me the steps they are taking in becoming succesful.  Friends walking back into my life that I thought I lost forever.  The realization that life is ever changing and learning from those changes are the most beautiful gifts.

So when Im driving now and an old familiar song plays that takes you back to the memories -I smile.  The freeness I feel now is something that is unexplainable.  Finding who you truly are is a journey and it takes people to help you achieve that.  The people that hurt you is not to be blamed for anything -- they were part of the journey to finding you.  Thank them and know within you learnt from them the lessons that have now made you even stronger than before. 

None of us are exempted from mistakes, we all make it and we all hurt others at some point in time -some intentional and some unintentional.  When others hurt you let it go, take no revenge its not worth it in the end -- use your energies for helping others, loving others, being kind to others and you will see that the world that u once thought was falling apart is now the world you cant wait to "live" in.